Death often seems to ruin the lives of survivors. Many people feel that they have a great emptiness in their body and mind. With the death of the loved one, life takes some drastic changes and demands that the survivor start new routines without the support and company of the loved one. It looks like hell on earth.

So what do mourners seem to accomplish that helps them come to terms with their great losses and begin the long journey of adjusting to a new life? How do you adjust to the unknown and begin to find joy once again? This is what many have done to overcome, not around, their pain.

1. At some point, they decided to commit to the following approach: “I’m adjusting to the new. I’m going to get over this.” They decided that they had to change and accept the loss. Intention is an extremely powerful force. Do your best to start each day with a commitment to face your sadness head-on and embrace it as a natural response because you have loved. Put something on your nightstand (object, symbol, whatever is meaningful to you) as a reminder when you wake up in the morning to form the intention and tell yourself, “I’m persisting. I will survive this.”

2. Work on your inner life. All grief resolution begins with what you say to yourself day after day, week after week. This means that you have to be your best friend and treat yourself as you would a best friend. Come to the conclusion that what you keep thinking about grows. As you focus on the pain, it often worsens, depression sets in and deepens. Learn a technique that allows you to divert your attention from pain to a loving memory. Everybody needs a break from the pain. Continue to speak positively to yourself and tap into your spiritual beliefs for wisdom and strength.

3. Make the decision to talk to at least three people every day. Human interaction, with the right people and at the right time, will go a long way toward balancing your sadness and providing a necessary outlet for your feelings. On the other hand, isolation from others will prolong the acute pain phase of grief. Never stay alone for long periods of time. Yes, you need solitude, but not self-imposed isolation.

4. Come to the conclusion that there are two options open to you when a loved one dies: living in abject pain for the rest of your life (which will paralyze you for the rest of your life) or accepting what cannot be changed. . , look for the meaning of death and find a new purpose in life. Obviously, this process of consciousness cannot take place immediately. It takes a long time to absorb the pain. It takes more time to become familiar with a world that has drastically changed and to realize that death and struggle change the survivor. However, eventually you will have to choose one or the other path.

5. Listen to others; learn about the grievance and the fact that you can survive. We can all learn from information that is already available and has been used by millions over the years. And yes, there are still many people who cling to non-functional myths and beliefs about pain that should be avoided as much as possible. Look for quality sources by checking their credentials and the resources from which they draw their wisdom.

6. Be gentle with yourself when you have a bad day. Most mourners have bad days after experiencing several tolerable ones. Months later, you may feel the same as the first few days after your loved one’s death. There is a word that has a wide range of applications in the response to grief: normal. We are all different and we mourn differently, so don’t expect some kind of perfection. No one laments in a perfect format. Does not exist

Remember, the pain does not go away completely, it was never heard from again. Memory will bring us some sadness from time to time and we learn to live with it. You will too. Your loved one will always be part of you.

If it was a parent who died, you have your genes in you and your memory can always remember them, and you can choose to speak to them as you see fit. This is healthy as you move into the next phase of your life. Sure, the painful hole won’t go away, but look around for inspiration from all of you who are living proof that you can live with that reminder.