Please don’t leave me: separation anxiety from your dog

Separation anxiety is your dog’s real fear of being alone forever. This fear causes your dog to “act out” destructive behaviors that are sure to cause frustration in your home. The first rule of thumb is to train your family and friends to be responsible and keep valuables and important items in storage and out of harm’s way until this behavior problem is resolved.

Some of the causes of separation anxiety are being “relocated” in youth. You have rescued your puppy or dog from a shelter and their record involves being turned over by the owner to the shelter. Your dog may have already lost a family and will be sensitive when you leave the house. When you rescue a puppy or dog, they may have been abused or neglected and now that they are receiving the love and attention of your family they may fear that you will leave them and have to return to an abusive way of life. Another cause of separation anxiety is the end of summer vacation and the return to school hours. Your dog has come to expect children to be home all day and available to play and pay close attention to him. Regardless of the cause of separation anxiety, it is very important to resolve this behavior problem as soon as possible. Destructive behavior can quickly become very costly.

Some of the signs that your dog is experiencing separation anxiety include chewing on fur or paws, breaking pillows or his new pair of designer shoes, shredding paper, barking or whining, and making a mess around the house.

The best way to assure your dog that he will be fine when he leaves the house is to take the time to strengthen his ability to trust that you will return. You must first ensure that all family members agree to create non-emotional goodbyes and greetings. Make sure the comings and goings are “no big deal.” Second, you will need to change your normal morning routine. Your dog recognizes your routines. The alarm goes off. You take your dog for a walk. Take your shower. You cook breakfast and / or pack lunches. You brush your teeth. You collect your briefcase and keys before leaving home. Allow some extra time in the morning to add some vigorous exercise and play with your dog. This will help in two ways. It will tire your dog and a tired dog will take a nap while you are away. It will also reinforce your love and attention by reducing your dog’s fear of you abandoning him. Third, give your dog some more food after exercise. This will also lead to a very satisfying nap in the near future. Make sure all family members participate in providing meals. You cannot be the only provider of food, walks, games, etc … this will lessen your dog’s fear when you have to leave. Fourth, give your dog extra attention in the hours before you plan to leave and leave the radio or television on to provide background noise that makes your dog feel like he’s not alone in the house. Another thing that will help is providing plenty of suitable chew items for your dog to chew on if the need to destroy something takes over. A perfect choice is a hollow toy like a “Kong” filled with a wonderful treat. These toys also make it a challenge to retrieve the treat that will keep you busy for a long time.

All of these things will help reduce your dog’s separation anxiety, but the best course of action is preventive in nature. For example, in the weeks before school starts, gradually begin to allow your dog to be alone for short periods of time. Employ the unemotional goodbyes, the extra exercise, the big breakfast, the extra attention. Leave your dog totally alone for 15 to 30 minutes at a time and continue this routine while increasing the time he is away. Hopefully by the time school starts, your dog won’t feel any stress or separation anxiety because you’ve trained him to always come back.

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